The Reflective Parent: How to Do Less and Relate More with Your Kids

Book excerpt: An innovative parenting approach empowering parents to trust their instincts and embrace uncertainty. Figuring out how to raise happy, healthy, and successful kids can be overwhelming. Parents find themselves wading through tons of conflicting advice. Books that outline a “right way” of doing things can leave even the most dedicated caregiver feeling discouraged and inadequate when real life doesn’t measure up. An experienced psychiatrist and founder of the Center for Reflective Communities, Regina Pally serves up something totally different in her book. She argues that the key to successful parenting is learning to slow down, reflect, and recognize that there is no one key to doing it right. The Reflective Parent synthesizes the latest in neuroscience research to show that our brain’s natural tendencies to empathize, analyze, and connect with others are all we need to be good parents. Each chapter weaves together discussions of specific reflective parenting principles like “Tolerate Uncertainty” and “Repair Ruptures” with engaging explanations of the science that backs them up. Brief “Take Home Lessons” at the end of each chapter and vivid examples of parents and children putting the principles into action make this a highly readable, practical guide for anyone looking to build loving, lasting relationships with their kids.