Liberalstein

Book excerpt: After numerous disasters in the lab, a geneticist, Victor Liberalstein, succeeds in cloning a seemingly ideal liberal candidate. The candidate, whom Victor vainly names Frank N. Liberalstein, is brilliant, articulate, and movie star handsome. But Victor and his midget clone assistant, Albore, know Liberalstein has a serious defect, one that in a nanosecond could cause him to mutate into a liberal monster. Liberalstein's dangerous flaw, however, is also what makes him so attractive as a candidate-he's engorged with the genes of the world's most notorious political and celebrity liberals. People like Bill and Hillary Wimpton, Michael S'Moore, George Looney, the Rev. Al Sharlatan, and Jane Fondue. Victor's boss and benefactor is the volatile Dr. Howard Steam, former Vermont Governor and proctologist, now Chair of the Covert Democratic National Committee. Despite Victor's warnings about Liberalstein's volatility, Steam orders him to prepare Liberalstein to run for President in 2008. Will Victor develop drugs or make genetic alterations in time to stop Liberalstein's wild tendencies? Will Victor win the heart of sexy California Senator Polly Poxer? Will President Liberalstein actually cede Miami to Al Gouda terrorists? Liberals and conservatives alike will enjoy C. D. Jewell's Liberalstein, a wild and wacky political satire.