How to Be Really Annoying

Book excerpt: Over 150 ways to master the art of being incredibly irritating. In a world full of trivial annoyances and a slow, steady drip of irritations, it can be hard to find a way to stand out. We can all be irritating without trying, but in very minor ways. To elevate your ability to be spectacularly annoying demands focus, courage, determination, and creativity—this book will show you how. Commuting? Always take at least two bags, and sit with your legs wide apart on the subway. Eating out? Always reject the first two tables offered, then change your mind and go back to one of them (preferably after ordering your food). Flying? Wait until the person next to you has their tray table down and covered in food and drink before deciding you need to use the bathroom. Covering work, home life, relationships, birthdays, nights out, and plenty more, this hilarious guide will leave you well equipped to annoy anyone and everyone, no matter what the occasion.