She's So Funny

Book excerpt: No one is more qualified to collect hilarious material from women comedians than funny lady Judy Brown, the author behind the top-selling comedy collections Joke Soup, Joke Stew, The Funny Pages, and Jokes to Go. Brown's latest humor book, She's Always Funny, offers the best, biting laughs from both the funniest females performing today and classic women comedians. This comprehensive roundup of hilarious observations and classic bits from women stand-ups is the first of its kind and is alphabetized by subject, from Adoption to Younger Men, so you'll have no trouble finding the perfect funny quip from a woman's perspective on hundreds of topics.Don't cook. Don't clean. No man will ever make love to a woman because she waxed the linoleum. "My God, the floor's immaculate. Lie down, you hot bitch." -Joan RiversI don't need a baby growing inside me for nine months. For one thing, there's morning sickness. If I'm going to feel nauseous and achy when I wake up, I want to achieve that state the old-fashioned way: getting good and drunk the night before. -Ellen DeGeneresIn my day there was no pill; it was trick or treat. I had far too many kids. At one time in our playpen it was standing room only. It looked like a bus stop for midgets. It used to be so damp in there we had a rainbow above it. -Phyllis DillerGoing out with a jerky guy is kind of like having a piece of food caught in your teeth. All your friends notice it before you do. -Livia Squires I go running when I have to. When the ice cream truck is doing 60. -Wendy Liebman From With lines from Phyllis Diller, Roseanne, Rosie O'Donnell, Caroline Rhea, Rita Rudner, Janeane Garofalo, Margaret Cho, Whoopi Goldberg, Wanda Sykes, Elayne Boolser, Aisha Tyler, and more, She's Always Funny delivers the goods from the top women comedians of the last 50 years and offers countless hours of laughter.