Satisfactions

Book excerpt: Links below will take you to the non-profit Break the Cycle! Web site (formerly Stepfamily inFormation). Use your browser's Back button to return to the Xlibris.com bookstore. Premise: From newborn infants to dying adults, we all communicate to reduce local discomforts - i.e. to fill current needs. Doing that promotes satisfaction. Anything you do that causes a significant emotional-spiritual-physical-mental change in another person can be called communication. It's impossible to not communicate with other people, for silence and inactivity cause reactions and presumed meanings. The quality of your life and key relationships depends largely on the effectiveness of the way you communicate - yet you probably don't know what you need to know about this vital life skill. To reality check that, mull these five challenges: 1) Name a learned skill that you rely on more often than communicating to get your key needs met. Note that thinking is internal communication. 2) How do you distinguish between effective and ineffective communication? If you're not sure, how can you tell if you're communicating effectively in important situations? 3) On a scale of 1 (totally ineffective) to 10 (totally effective), generally how effective a communicator would you rate yourself in calm times __ and in conflicts __ recently? 4) Identify the five most important people in your current life. From 1 to 10, how effective would you rate yourself in your communication with each of them in calm __ and conflictual __ times? How effective would each of them rate you? 5) Take your time, and see how well you do with this communication quiz. Then return. Would you like to improve your communication effectiveness with others and yourself? Seven Essential Skills This unique guidebook describes and illustrates seven vital communication skills that any motivated person can learn, with practice. They are: Awareness Clear thinking, Digging down, Effective assertion, Metatalking (talking cooperatively about communication),