Rocking the Spinsterhood

Book excerpt: Amelia is 49, fast approaching 50, single, long-term dateless and constantly brooding over a lost love of 25 years ago. She passes the years fantasising over Gary Guzzler, an aging rock star, whom she has loved and idolised since she was a teenager, and who has begun touring again after a long hiatus. She is forever daydreaming about meeting Gary and falling in love. Laura, Amelia’s friend and total nymphomaniac, wants her to get over her lost love and unhealthy fascination with Gary Guzzler, so suggests she have a go at online dating because it is “cheaper than Botox, liposuction or counselling.” To get her started, Laura treats Amelia to a three-month online dating subscription for her 50th birthday. It is only for three months. What could possibly go wrong? Will she meet her dream man, or forever remain within her dreams?