Geordies vs Mackems and Mackems vs Geordies

Book excerpt: The rivalry between the cities of Newcastle and Sunderland is one of the fiercest and longest standing in Britain. Now "Mackems vs Tackems & Tackems vs Mackems" takes a look at the funny side of this enduring rivalry.Just to give you a flavour of how much Mackems and Tackems mutually detest each other, try this little jibe from the Newcastle terraces: Thieves broke into the trophy room of the Stadium of Shite, as the Tackems have lovingly christened Sunderland's Stadium of Light, and stole the entire contents. Police are looking for a 50-foot red and white stripy carpet.Or how about: A Takkem fan is leaving the ground after yet another Keegan tactical disaster. A lady of the night comes up to him and says: 'Do you fancy a blow job, pet?' He stares at her in a dim, Takkem-like way, and asks: 'Will it affect me Giro?'Within this volume you will find the reasons why a Geordie would rather take Osama Bin Laden home for tea that a Mackem. Of course all Tackems know that Mackems have all the qualities of a poker, except for its occasional warmth, and that the worst two things about any given Mackem is his (or her) face.The people of these two great cities have traditionally regarded each other with the greatest possible loathing, mistrust and contempt.They are both absolutely right. And this book is the proof.