Maxine's Guide to Aging Gracelessly

Book excerpt: She's crabby, she's feisty, and she takes no guff from anyone. Maxine has been a hit character since she first appeared on a greeting card back in 1986. No sweet sentiment here; Maxine just tells it like it is! One of Shoebox Greetings' most eccentric and beloved personalities, Maxine now gets her own birthday gift book that is sure to delight cranky birthday observers everywhere. Some of Maxine's choice sayings on aging include: "Birthdays are like relatives at the holidays. They show up whether you want them to or not."Birthdays are a time when there's a whole lotta shakin' goin' on. Yeah, those upper arms are always the first to go."Mother Nature thinks of everything. She makes your hair turn gray before it falls out so you don't miss it as much."Birthdays are like chocolate chip cookies. If you think about how many you've had, it kinda makes you sick."